Important People in Life?

Ever tried to define a criteria for the most important people in life?

If yes... could you list any?

For me it has always been about love, love n' love. Many times I have mentioned to people that even if love is the only thing that makes the world go around, it is also one of the selfish emotions we share. Love lives on the basic foundation of the fact that 'the feeling that we love a person' is making is feel happy. We are in short looking for our happiness everywhere.

Then comes kindness, compassion & care all categorized with a term unconditional.

For me the most important people in life have been those who have been logically kind and unconditionally supportive. The relation or the amount of love they have given me hardly matter. This maybe a lesson that I have learnt from my last life as well my upbringing and understanding of the relations in the world here. And it always made a huge impact on me all my life. Thankfully all that ended up making me feel dependent on all the system for my survival but independent of an individual. That doesn't mean I never expect that to happen. I still search for people who would be enlisted in the list of people I trust, people who have been logically kind to everyone they know and unconditionally supportive for me.

Let me start with some basic factors. I have never hated my parents but could never develop a trustworthy relation with them because I always saw their behavior with me or anyone else they love or respect. My mother has been to moral and ethical while my father has always been involved in his own desires and image. My mother can never hesitate to oppose me if I am wrong and will stand from enemy lines firing at me, no she still loves me. Call it her ideal.... 'Mother India' kinda. This problem always made me understand that when I am wrong, she is not going to cover up my fault and stand with me though she might still stand with me having accepted my mistake and uncovering it to the world. Thats not it! As a child it made me insecure and helped me cope a lot as an adult. I finally realised its all ethics & morals. She is a good person but a bad mother. In my definition, I dont want a mother who treats everyone coming to her like a child like a mother, then whats the use of having a mother of my own? Doesn't make much of a difference, because if my mother is going to stand against me treating my rivals like her own children I feel like a motherless child. Yes there is a motherlike figure with me who still supports me and loves me as a mother. Should I blindly trust this relation just because 'blood is thicker than water?'

My dad, never been a help and never been a problem if ignored. I dont hate him. But I hate him whenever I try to communicate with him. Its not possible. He himself accepts that he doesn't know many things yet he he will feel that he is the best judge of any situation. For me he always remained as my mothers puppet who did what she told. So his support has been entirely based on what stand my mother has taken. So needless to say its all f*****ed up. Otherwise in their general parental duties they have never failed. I don't hate them. I respect them for what I am today even for these experiences they have given me. But that made me more strength to remain detached from the world.

I came across many people otherwise who lent me unconditional support in all forms. Though they would show me my mistakes or argue with me, it will be in personal conversations. There were 2 friends and they still are my friends just have distanced after I married who will still stand by me till death. Because they know me. One more example was my uncle. He never used to put me down in front of public. Never tried to prove anyone else or himself right no matter what the situation. If he had a difference of opinion he used to discuss that one - one. No one else involved. He handled things effeciently and didn't allow me to sulk for silly reasons. The reason I always said he was my last attachment that no longer exists is because I was a child that grew with him with trust, belief and a true experience that proved what he told me "Dont waste your time and energy in fighting for your small demands. IF someone is not favoring you or giving you something even your parents dont worry. Tell me. I'll provide you with that if you prove to me that its essential". His commitment to me expanded from general things like having a milkshake to helping me win my love. He trusted me in and my love... never let me down.

Even in his last days, last moments he died with the belief that I married the girl I love, which I never tried to fight. I wanted to confuse the heavenly system up there with the hellish situations they put him into. Believe me but everything has a link, an attachment, a communication channel with the heavens or higher systems up there that control or govern us. The network is based on things like life and death and many times on evolved people who meditate or can communicate on a higher level. And I believe that my whole life in future will be a bit in a wobbly mode from the sub-governing energies up there. I will have a stronger threshold with the supreme power and myself, giving me more control.. more of LIVING.

Today another experience with my own parents and other important family members over a silly issue rattled me and revoked my past. No matter what you do for parents, no matter what you do for friends... no matter what you do for strangers. Even if you have given up your real life for them, they will still act diplomatic in situations where they see I am being put down and they dont want to be on my side or the other just because they want to be good in both the books.

After a long long time I remembered the most important people in my life and realized the importance of starting that hunt again. I am yet alone.... yet trapped in people who are living with a diplomacy forgetting what I did for them in life... forgetting what I taught them in life... forgetting what is it that makes everyone trust me and my opinions so blindly.

They forgot that I call my people... MY people. I stand by them even when they are wrong, I argue with them privately. They forgot that real unconditional support is of giving up everything you have because it might help someone else get everything they wanted. But time has made me realize. I failed again.

To see that I dont get disillusioned again, thinking that I am in reliable people & being supported by their power, I designed and put a wallpaper on my desktop that says, "F$$K you Nikhil Gangavane. You are a looser... lost again being kind!" This will always remind me that I have to bring back the right supports, right people who I can live with. But this doesn't mean I have lost faith in my kindness and intentions. I will always support people I love, like my uncle did. Keeping real life alive in me and all those who trust me.